5 October 2017
Katharsis – Catharsis – κάθαρση
It is now a few minutes past 11:30 p.m., at night, Wednesday, shortly before midnight.
I went to bed early this evening, before eight. Slept a bit, woke, slept again. Then, just before I woke up, a few minutes before eleven thirty, I had a dream. A vivid dream, full of music and emotion.
I was performing in a production of Jesus Christ Superstar.
Specifically, we were singing the lyrics leading up to the crucifiction.
I cannot tell you exactly what scene, what words, what moment it was in the text of that famous rock opera, but I knew what it was while we – several other people and I – were singing and performing and acting. It was those last hours of the day before he was killed.
In my dream I saw words written before me in the air, words that were like they were being briefly spelled by small twigs and sticks forming letters that floated and then vanished, like titles in a movie, words that hung in the air before me, while we were singing. Along with the sound of our singing and the simple instrumental music behind us, there was also a voice in my mind, that said, follow the words. Just follow the words.
Half an hour later, now, awake in these minutes before midnight, I cannot remember exactly what the words were that we were singing, but I remember seeing them and singing them and experiencing the rising current of emotion as we performed and as we realized what was happening, as we re-lived, like actors do, the events and movements we were re-creating. As we interpreted that story and song. The passion play, in its post-modern, 20th century, incarnation.
Transfigured into a simple dream before midnight.
I awoke with the immediate understanding that this has so much, everything, to do with my struggle to write the words of Nikos.
I also believe, now, as I write these words, my diary words, down on my little qwerty keyboard, that I was singing the role of Judas. I woke up just before –
. . . .